Just weeks after announcing her pregnancy, Jessica Alba has confirmed that she and Cash Warren are engaged. Jessica Alba, blah blah. Engaged, blah blah. I'm sorry, but Jessica Alba honestly just bores the fucking bejeezus out of me. But good for her, I guess. Nothing says, "It's time to get hitched" like "I put a baby in there." I know I always imagined my wedding night with a Shirley Temple in hand while barfing up my wedding cake.