Oh God! Oh God! Shave it off, man. Shave it off now. Jesus Christ. No one appreciates Sam Rockwell more than I, but Dude: This is a film premiere. Not the back of the Mystery Machine with Daphne's skirt hiked halfway up her ass. Put on a nice shirt, man. Comb your fucking hair. Open your eyes. Buy a reasonably sized pair of specs. And shave that heinous thing off your chin -- you look like you've been slapped by a pubic fairy.

More from the Cassandra's Dream premiere, including Colin Farrell with Woody Allen, Rosie Perez, and Tom Cavanaugh: