Britney Spears was scheduled to appear at a very important deposition yesterday regarding the custody of her children -- however in a completely shocking and unprecedented turn of events, she didn't so much uh, go.

Sam Lufti, Spears' primary hanger-on of late, said the singer's anxiety level was too high for her to honor the appointment and that she bailed on the meeting after phoning a doctor.

Per Lufti, Spears had every intention of making the deposition and said the duo "got up and ready to go" to the offices of Federline's lawyer. "Her attorneys came to pick her up, but when she saw the media frenzy outside her house, her anxiety skyrocketed."

Who the hell did she call, Dr. Meth? Maybe next time Britney is needed in court they should just scratch out "Los Angeles County Courthouse" on the summons and write in "Starbucks" over the address instead. That oughta get her there. And just in case she catches onto the ruse, be sure to hang a sign outside of the courthouse that says "FREE FRAPPACINOS TODAY." Not only will she not mind the media frenzy, but she'll even call them herself.