The first rule of Fight Club is ... Dance! (Jazz Hands!)

That's what you might expect on Broadway in the next couple of years, as the director of Fight Club, David Fincher, is considering moving it to the stage.

"One of the things I want at the 10-year anniversary is to do Fight Club as a musical on Broadway. I love the idea of that."

Fight Club: The Musical? Can you imagine? Ripped men punching one another on stage while singing? All that testosterone mixed with show tunes? Are we talking about, perhaps, the gayest production in the history of Broadway? They'd never make it through an entire show before the audience ripped off their shirts and commenced having rough, angry sex with one another? I'm not a gay man, but just thinking about Fight Club: The Musical, I want to run out and make some beefcakian Adonis my bitch. Hell, the only problem I have with Fight Club: The Musical, is the fourth rule of Fight Club: Only two guys to a fight. If I'm gonna pay $100 to see a Broadway production, I wanna see an orgy of men duking it out without their shirts off in a mad, angry frenzy of glistening sweat and ...

*holy shit*

Fight Club: The Musical will be the homosexual community's greatest recruiting tool, ever -- even the straightest men will wield to its powers. Fincher, you're a mad genius.