Cultural Antichrist: Noun. The pop cultural messenger to a great personal opponent of Christ who will spread evil throughout the world.
I usually refrain from mentioning Heidi Montag and her ilk around these parts, since I'm not partial to adding any fuel to the useless, famewhorey fire that is "The Hills" and all it's bastard offspring -- but in this case I couldn't help it. Heidi has released this music video with the help of boyfriend Spencer Pratt, and it is with a doubt, the worst thing I have ever seen in my entire life. Keep in mind, I recently sat through an hour and 15 minutes of the Hannah Montana concert movie, which was a fucking cakewalk compared to three minutes and change of this shit. It combines all the cinematography of amateur porn with choreography usually reserved for eight year olds emulating (pre-crazy) Britney Spears in front of their bedroom mirrors -- set to a song that sounds like it could be the backdrop to a Saturday Night Live spoof video. And yet, somehow these elements manage to come together to create a sum far more terrible than of its terrible, terrible parts. The only way it could possibly be worse is if that beach were to split open and unleash the rotting corpses of Hilter and Saddam Hussein from hell to approach that plastic malfeasance on all fours and put her in a pair of fingercuffs.
In summary, this video is nothing short of the Cultural Antichrist. May God hath mercy on our souls.
Dear god! Her hands look like talons. Why are they so insanely disproportionate to the rest of her?
vanessa said:
This music video is HORRIBLE. So cheap. I bet this vidoe cost 100 dollors max to make. 1 bikini and one cheap video recorder
that bees chick said:
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAaaaaaa...
*wipes eyes* No, seriously, tho, this is just some prank, right? Viral?
Lainie said:
Wow. I thought you were exaggerating, but that was downright painful. Thanks so much for inflicting it on us. Soon we're going to see zany reaction videos of people watching this.
Jo 'Mama' Besser said:
I don't usually take the bait when it comes to things like this. Whatever I'm experiencing now--it's my own fault. I think I was just overcome with having two snow days in less than a week, it's numbed my intellegence. The snow, too.
anon said:
"May God hath mercy on our souls."
Um, from one pedantic grammarian to another, "hath" is third-person singular, present tense ("has").
Here endeth the lesson.
(Oh, and my eyes and ears are currently battling it out to see who's more offended by this dreck. Thanks.)
bree said:
i think i'm vomitted a little in my mouth. and i know my brain is running out my ears. i'm stunned. i'm going to watch britney at the vmas to get that out of my mind.
Edith said:
Wow. That makes me long for the class and subtlety of Paris Hilton eating a hamburger.
So SO bad. I'm kind of embarrassed for her. "Sexy" is so rarely actually sexy, and this is just a perfect example of that.
Dear god! Her hands look like talons. Why are they so insanely disproportionate to the rest of her?
This music video is HORRIBLE. So cheap. I bet this vidoe cost 100 dollors max to make. 1 bikini and one cheap video recorder
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAaaaaaa...
*wipes eyes* No, seriously, tho, this is just some prank, right? Viral?
Wow. I thought you were exaggerating, but that was downright painful. Thanks so much for inflicting it on us. Soon we're going to see zany reaction videos of people watching this.
I don't usually take the bait when it comes to things like this. Whatever I'm experiencing now--it's my own fault. I think I was just overcome with having two snow days in less than a week, it's numbed my intellegence. The snow, too.
"May God hath mercy on our souls."
Um, from one pedantic grammarian to another, "hath" is third-person singular, present tense ("has").
Here endeth the lesson.
(Oh, and my eyes and ears are currently battling it out to see who's more offended by this dreck. Thanks.)
i think i'm vomitted a little in my mouth. and i know my brain is running out my ears. i'm stunned. i'm going to watch britney at the vmas to get that out of my mind.
Wow. That makes me long for the class and subtlety of Paris Hilton eating a hamburger.
So SO bad. I'm kind of embarrassed for her. "Sexy" is so rarely actually sexy, and this is just a perfect example of that.