Idiots: Noun, plural. Mentally handicapped person(s).

If you harbor any doubt over whether or not Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz are total fucking idiots, take a gander at this clip of the couple trying their hand at "comedy." Self depreciating humor is kind of hard to fuck up, but somehow these two manage to make themselves look like even bigger obnoxious retards than previously assumed. If you don't want to watch it (understandable) I'll do my best to recap.

First of all, they proclaim themselves to be "the world's greatest assholes" because Pete mocks humanitarian efforts as being too hard, instead devoting themselves to the cause of illegal music downloading. (Like anyone wants to download their shit anyway.) And to solve this crisis, he says that he'll "make a baby, because you can't download a [fucking] baby." It's at this point Ashlee comes on camera with a pillow stuffed under her shirt, impersonating Britney Spears (I think?) by eating Cheetos and talking in a Southern drawl. And then it ends with a music montage to Joe Esposito's "You're the Best" from Karate Kid -- which I thought was scientifically proven to add hilarity to any given situation, but somehow manages to do just the opposite here. It's as if the two of them are a vortex of suck which inexplicably drains humor from everything.