Obscene: (Adjective) Offensive or disgusting by accepted standards of morality and decency.

So yesterday afternoon I came across these photos of Spencer and Heidi whoring it up at The Magic Kingdom, and I thought to myself: "Not bad -- but I bet I can find Disney pictures even more crass and offensive than this." But as it turns out, the spywear at my office sends off a red flashing light when it detects you google searching something like "Explicit Hardcore Mickey Mouse Fucking Minnie Mouse Pics Anal." Or should I say, former office, because -- funny story -- it turns out HR doesn't have the best sense of humor about employees searching for pornographic Disney cartoons during work hours. Who knew? Anywho, suffice to say I'm in the market for a new (preferably easy) desk job where it wouldn't be considered a "conflict of interest" to write for a gossip blog or look up porn at work. Any takers, corporate world?

Oh yeah: Heidi's shirt totally does say, "I Want More Privacy," as she's getting her picture taken by the paparazzi they paid to have follow them. Hahahahahahaha.