Downgrade (Adjective) When someone goes from having something relatively good to something that is worse than the original.

Eesh. Jena Malone was so cute in Step-Mom, wasn't she? And kind of cool in Saved! And you'd like to think this is because of a role she's filming, but she's already got one film in the can and nothing else upcoming.

I know how it is, though. You have one of those days where your hair is annoying the hell out of you, but the only thing more unappealing is spending 45 minutes with your hairdresser, who is guaranteed to drone on about Paris or Lindsay and you're all, "Like I don't get enough of that shit at home." So, you take out the only thing you have -- a pair of dog clippers you bought once because you thought it'd be easier than taking the mutt to Petsmart every four weeks (it wasn't) -- and then you start working at your beautiful flowing locks, backwards in the mirror, and before you know it, a chia pet has shat on your head.

I'll tell Jena what my old man always used to tell me: "It'll grow out. Eventually. Until such time as it does, invest in hat. You're not the fucking lead singer of Rancid. Now take out the trash you little shit."