Bruised: (Verb) To have hurt someone's feelings or pride.

This would be sad if it weren't so funny. No wait, strike that -- this would never be sad. Anyway, John Mayer has allegedly sworn off women after his breakup with Jennifer Aniston.

“Since his breakup with Jennifer Aniston, he isn’t into anyone,” an insider tells In Touch. Even when the 30-year-old rocker hit NYC hotspot Tenjune on September 16, he only hung out with guys. “Lately, he’s really only spending time with his longtime friends — even some high school pals,” says the insider, adding that they can all be counted on to keep mum about his private life. “He’s always just with the people he can depend on. He’s even calling them his ‘circle of trust.’” (Source)

I guess nothing soothes the sting left by a woman quite like a little quality dude time. You can never underestimate the healing powers of a circle jerk. And a bro who comes through with a beej in your time of need? Is a bro for life.

Editor's Note: Get it? It's because John Mayer is gaaay!

More of Jennifer Aniston not looking particularly devastated in Cabo earlier this week: