Yuck: (Exclamation) Used to express strong distaste or disgust.

Tori Spelling once again put her nutrition-deprived body on display while vacationing with her husband Dean McDermott and their children in Hawaii last week. Jesus. How long ago did she pop a kid out? She's famously said that breast-feeding helped her melt off the pounds, but having an entire Hooters restaurant worth of breasts wouldn't do this to a person.

Yummy: (Adjective) Very pleasing to the senses, esp. to the taste; delicious.

Apropos of nothing, here are photos of one of my pretend boyfriends Jared Padalecki at the premiere of Friday the 13th, because he's pretty and I like him. And if you were wondering -- because, I'm sure you are -- yes, my real boyfriend is more than comfortable with my pretend relationships with Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ackles. He understands that he has a very special place in my heart too, but my heart is just too big to contain just one person alone. I can't help that. See now, if the men who got taken on Maury were that eloquent, I bet their girlfriends and wives would be a lot less mad at them.

Yee-haw: (Exclamation) An expression of enthusiasm or exuberance, typically associated with rural inhabitants of the southern U.S.

You all know how much I hate the Hogan family, and how much it would sadden me for anything good to happen to any of them. So unfortunately I have to report that Brooke Hogan has finally scored a high-profile gig... Wrestling at the Florida State Fair!!! Pssssyche!!!

Wilson Media tells tbt* and The Juice* that the deal is "90 percent done," but Hogan is "due to wrestle" Rick Flair's son in a circus tent after the last show of the day by Circus Hollywood. Now that shows some promise. (Source)

I love that "Brooke Hogan" and "circus tent" are finally being uttered together in the same sentence. Never have two things been more destined to go together since peanut butter met jelly. On a side note, I wonder what a sweet gig like that pays? Aside from the obvious prestige, of course.

More of the family freak show driving around Ocean Drive in a miniature Cadillac Escalade:

Yum: (Exclamation) Used to express pleasure at eating, or at the prospect of eating a particular food.

Katherine Heigl chowing down on her favorite treat: live puppeh.

Yawn: (Verb) To involuntarily open one's mouth wide and inhale deeply due to tiredness or boredom.

Megan Fox, who -- if you'll recall -- is uncomfortable with people calling her sexy, regaled GQ with tales of her forays into homosexuality with lesbian strippers. You know, just for good old times sake.

"Well, that year my boyfriend broke up with me, and I decided - oh man, sorry, mommy! - that I was in love with this girl that worked at the Body Shop," Fox said. "I decided that I was going to get her to love me back, and I went out of my way to create a relationship with this girl, a stripper named Nikita." Fox said Nikita would do "these beautiful slow dances to Aerosmith ballads." She added that she would bring the Russian stripper gifts and try to inspire her to quit her line of work.

Despite the relationship, Fox said she does not identify herself as gay. "Look, I'm not a lesbian," she went on. "I just think that all humans are born with the ability to be attracted to both sexes. (Source)

So, there you have it! Megan Fox isn't a lesbian; she just likes to bang girls and Brian Austin Green. Call it what you want, but that right there pretty much rules out 100% of the male population. So take that to your Megan Fox masturbation session! Oh, I meant the part where Megan Fox wants nothing to do with you or your dick, not the part where she has sex with gi-- oh, just forget it.

More of Vinegar Farts McGee sticking stuff in her mouth for GQ:

Yikes (Exclamation) Used to express mild fear or surprise.

Yikes! Now wait a second -- I though Heath Ledger was supposed to play the Joker in The Dark Knight.

Seriously, though -- were they trying to make her look like one of those animatronic gypsy ladies inside machines that spit out fortunes at state fairs, or did the Tatler design department try to airbrush her photo with MS Paint. Because, wow! That's some kind of awful. She looks like Cameron Diaz in a funhouse mirror.

You Win (Expression)  A term used to let someone else know that they have achieved superiority.

Damn you, Emmanuelle! You dress well. You're lovely. You never do anything stupid. You haven't embarrassed yourself (save for that role in You Don't Mess with the Zohan) and you're Canadian! What's not to love? How can we mock you? Give us something to work with here, Emmanuelle. Isn't there a coma somewhere you can drink yourself into? A scratching post you can start dating? A piece of toilet paper you can stick to the bottom of your heels? Something?

You hate gossip bloggers, don't you, Emmanuelle? All you care about is yourself and your blemish free skin and your well-maintained reputation. Go to hell!

Yay: (Exclamation) Expressing triumph, approval, or encouragement.

It's not often I get to post pictures of the lovely and amazing Zooey Deschanel, so I have to make the most out of it when I can. I guess you could say she's my ultimate girl crush, although strangely, I've been told I look like her. So... Figure that one out. (It's not very hard.) Actually, I even have a pink dress a lot like this, which I wore to my ten year high school reunion. And you know, everyone else was wearing, like, sweaters and jeans and looking at me like I was crazy for wearing a pink satin cocktail dress. So what? At least I'm not boring.

More of Zooeylicious at the premiere of The Happening and also some guy from New Kids on the Block, I think:

You're Welcome (Expression) A polite way to to respond to thanks. Implies that the other person is welcome to ask for any other favors.

Your Body Is a Wonderland: (Song Title) Probably the gayest song ever supposedly written about Jennifer Love Hewitt.

Oooh! It's the ultimate He said, He said! Professional blogger/douchebag Perez Hilton went on Ryan Seacrest's radio show yesterday to declare that not only is professional musician/douchebag John Mayer bisexual and "struggling with his sexuality," but that the two also hooked up. Naturally, Mayer's reps deny everything.

Of their liplock at NYC club Stereo last year, Hilton said, "He kissed me, and I kissed him back. It was on the mouth with tongue. "I thought he was messing with me," Hilton went on. "Then he kept going and going." (Source)

This is quite a conundrum. On one hand, John Mayer being gay would explain a lot. On the other hand, going gay for Fatty McTardHair is like breaking your diet for a partially eaten Twinkie you find sitting in the garbage with a cigarette butt sticking out of it. On the other hand, there's "Your Body is a Wonderland." But I'm not sure if that supports or contradicts the evidence.

My verdict? Let's send them both to the sun in a rocket stamped "Douchebag Express." Maybe they'll sort it out themselves on the way.

Yay! (Noun) Used as an exclamation of pleasure, approval, elation, or victory.

Squee! (Noun) A feeling of excitement and happiness; a random ecstatic exclamation.

Teri Hatcher is being sued by Hydroderm after breaking an "exclusive endorsement deal" she signed with the company in 2005, by allegedly promoting products for City Cosmetics.

"Hatcher's name, image and likeness have been linked to so many competitors' products (at least 17!) that it is anyone's guess as to what product keeps her skin and lips youthful," said the lawsuit.

What keeps Teri Hatcher's skin and lips youthful? Uh, is "no substance known to mankind" an acceptable answer? If the people at Hydroderm had three collective brain cells to knock around between them, they might see that the best course of action here is the same you'd take when accidentally cutting a burrito fart in the middle of your office -- clear your throat inconspicuously, back away slowly and pretend it never happened.