Contaminated

Contaminated Defined:
Impure by exposure to or addition of a poisonous or polluting substance.

Scarlett Johansson is a dirty, filthy woman. Johansson’s ex, Josh Hartnett recently revealed that his role in the film 30 Days Of Night was put into jeopardy due to a disease he contracted from kissing the actress’s contaminated lips. Gross. From Starpulse:

The 29-year-old struggled to film scenes in the vampire picture after contracting the “kissing disease.” He says, “I was falling apart because I had glandular fever, otherwise known as the kissing disease. You’re supposed to have it at 14, so apparently I haven’t kissed enough people.”

While that’s quite chivalrous of him to say, does anyone believe that a smokin’ hot  piece of meat like Josh Hartnett ever had trouble with the ladies? Bravo, sir… Bravo. Then again, I suppose there’s really no nice way of saying, “I would have been safer making out with a used truck stop urinal cake than Scarlett Johansson.” Or, “I sure hope Ryan Reynolds sleeps in a fully equipped Hazmat suit.” Nope, really no nice way of saying that at all.

Reactions:

I don’t usually visit celeb blogs, but count me in on this one, Pajiba people. I love me some smart humor. Oh, and also, don’t mess with Scarlett. Josh Hartnett just now realized what he’s missing out on.

Well, he won’t be playing a DOCTOR anytime soon. “Glandular disease” is just mono, which you can get from drinking after someone or sharing a straw or fork. Anytime you share saliva with someone who’s infected, you can get mono. And the only reason teens get it a lot is… well, they’re horny teens 🙂

You say on Pajiba that your goal is to do Websters “without the overt misogyny you see on some of the gossip blogs,” but I found this post to be incredibly misogynistic — saying she’s a “dirty, filthy woman” for having — GOD FORBID! — mono is as over-the-top sexist as it comes. Does that make every middle schooler with mono from sharing sodas a “dirty, filthy woman”? Or only if they also happen to be famous and generally thought of as beautiful? It’s not like she gave him gonnorhea, for starters, and also, she must have gotten it from somewhere. How come the source of her “kissing disease” isn’t also dirty and filthy? Could it be because she probably caught it from a dude, and we all know that boys will be boys, and sow their wild oats, and that doesn’t make them “contaminated”?