Favorite

Favorite Defined: Preferred before all others of the same kind.

Oprah unveiled her annual list of “Oprah’s Favorite Things” on Tuesday, which naturally contained the usual assortment of crap for rich, boring white people — including $59 mail-order cupcakes, a Josh Groban Christmas album, fancy Scrabble, Oprah’s Guide to Life, overpriced skincare, and these bizarre pantsuits for fat housewives who just don’t care anymore.

Noticeably missing from the list of Oprah’s Favorite Things? Stedman. I heard she considered him this year but ultimately went with the sorbet instead.