Pam Anderson is finally trotting that tired ass of hers out to pasture, saying in a recent interview that she plans to retire in five years.

“I get offers to do movies and TV all the time. I say no to everything. Drives my agent crazy,” she says, laughing. “But I’m lazy. I don’t want to work. I want to be with my kids.

I can only image how arduous Pam’s life must be — always having to show up at premieres and events, spilling out of her outfits looking drunk and slutty on the arm of her white trash husband ‘o the week. That kind of grueling lifestyle takes its toll on a girl! Maybe it’s time to settle down on a ranch, or something — you know, sitting out on a porch rocker all day, knitting thongs for the grandkids.

Tired: Something that has been repeated too often or something that is no longer exciting.